“No vocation is born of itself or lives for itself. A vocation flows from the heart of God and blossoms in the good soil of faithful people.”
– Pope Francis
At some point if you are a quasi-young, married male who is decent on his feet and remotely involved in the Church, you receive two invitations – one, to join the Knights of Columbus and two, to become a deacon. Don’t get me wrong, I’m deeply appreciative when someone sees a gift in me and affirms it with either invitation. The vocation to the permanent diaconate is not a call I have felt drawn to in the same way I felt called to marriage. However, within the span of a month, about 5-6 different people who had no connection to each other all suggested I should explore it. The last one, a deacon for whom I have great respect, offered to buy me dinner so we could chat - even after I told him I didn’t think it was for me. Free food is my love language.
The food, while delicious, wasn’t the highlight. My friend shared his own journey of discernment, formation, and ministry. He was honest, thoughtful, and open to all my questions and probing. But most noticeably, he was in love. He never talked about why I should do it, why I’d be good at it, or even why the Church needed me to do it. He spoke with deep authenticity about how his “yes” to the diaconate has shaped his life, formed his heart, and stretched him ways he could’ve never imagined. After decades in ministry, it was clear that whatever he had done for the Church paled in comparison to what this vocation did for him and his family.
As I drove home reflecting on all I had received, I was grateful for how the discussion helped me clarify the difference between a vocation and a job. While my friend has many gifts, his call didn’t have its source simply in his talents; it came from a relationship. While he does so much, it had nothing to do with what he accomplished or contributed, but how he had been conformed and configured by his openness to the Lord’s will. I wondered in my own vocation, how was I allowing myself to be bent into shape for the purpose God has for my life.
I’m still not sure the diaconate is my call, but I was blessed to see what a vocation rooted in love looks like. May we always give thanks not so much for what we get to do in this life, but for the relationship with whom, in whom, and through whom we are blessed to do it.
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